Blowing out another’s candle will not make yours shine brighter.

Question from a reader: Am I reinforcing what I don’t want to reinforce when the EFT tapping statement I say is not something I want to reinforce? For example, if I am angry at my friend and I make the statement “Even though I am angry at my friend,” won’t I end up more angry? If I tap this statement, isn’t it reinforcing the anger I already have toward my friend?

Answer: No. Tapping allows us to “desensitize” explosive and/or painful emotions.

What I have found to be the most effective manner in which to word an EFT tapping statement is to agree with the current emotional state so the physical body does not sabotage the tapping. It is the job of the physical body to protect us. (Put your hand over a flame and your body will pull your hand back from being burned.) In this situation, it is true and the body would agree, you are angry at your friend, so the statement would be, “Even though I am angry at my friend, I totally and completely accept myself.”

Acceptance brings us into present time. Anger does not exist in the present. Anger is usually about the past. Healing can only happen when we are in present time. By making the statement, “I totally and completely accept myself,” it brings us into present time. By making the statement, “Even though I am angry at my friend” this is the emotion that is being healed or desensitized.

Most likely, by the end of tapping the short form of EFT, the anger will have dissipated. Once the anger is dissipate, the situation can be examined more clearly rather than having the pain and hurt emotions being in control.


© Tessa Cason, Little Sage Enterprises, LLC, 2015.

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